I manage to get myself into a lot of unusual situations.
Today, most of them happened at work…
For example, this afternoon I was busy juggling many
different tasks when my colleague ran over to me declaring “Roland is dead!”
I stopped in my tracks, trying to remember if I’d ever met a
Roland and fathom how serious the situation was. It turns out that Roland was
the rat who had been trapped in our bins since the previous day. Pest control
had worked their magic and he was now in ratty heaven.
I was not going to mourn Roland. He had given me the fright
of my life when I was taking out the rubbish the day before and he looked
disgusting. He wasn't like the one in the Disney film, let's put it that way.
Another strange occurrence today involved the handyman that
came in to fix our bathroom door. He was there for less than an hour during
which I probably said about five sentences to him.
When demonstrating that he had fixed the door he suggested
that I test it. This involved testing the lock. Locking myself and said
handyman in the toilet, standing there for a few seconds and consequently agreeing
that, yes, the door was indeed working, was possibly the most awkward situation
of the day. Especially because one of the company directors was stood the other
side of the door wondering what the hell was going on.
Having signed all the paperwork I thought I was done with
that situation. Ten minutes later I get a mysterious phone call…
“Hi, is that Laura?”
“Yes, how can I help?”
“This might sound strange Laura but are you single?”
Now, being slightly confused at this question, I thought
this unknown caller was carrying out some kind of survey where you replied
either “married” or “single”. Boy did I regret my following answer.
“Yes, I am.”
“Oh, good! Do you want to go for a drink sometime? It’s A by
the way, I was in fixing the door a minute ago.”
Oh, God.
With the office being deadly quiet (possibly in mourning for
Roland still) I was unsure of how to deal with this situation without everyone
laughing at me. Previous to this phone call, my boss had stated that we would
use handyman’s company again, so I was going to have to let him down gently in
case he turned up again.
I had no choice but to pretend it was a sales call.
“I’m very sorry but we aren’t interested at this moment in
time.”
“Oh…oh…erm…”
At this point I was feeling a bit sorry for him. I panicked…
“If I give you my email address you can send me over some
details.”
“Ok yes! Thanks!”
“I will email you should we be interested.”
I haven’t emailed.
And now I need to find a boyfriend before the office needs
more repairs so that I can claim I’m not single should the issue arise again.
